Saturday, February 21, 2009

Journals Of My Alternate Mind.

I
Sorrows and Expectations

Facing the hopeful start of a new year,
I reflect yet again bitterness in the eyes,
as well as with anger and disbelieve both lodged in my heart.
It’s been awhile since
I've been in this state of mind
I'm now being forced to revisit.
The past year was almost too good to be true,
sure I've had the inevitable setbacks

life often throws at us,
few relationships,
none of them turned out the way I would have liked,
but didn’t hurt me either, so it worked just fine.
It was particularly important for me to not have been hurt,
my self-esteem needed a break from being put down,
so for the first time I was in control,

my broken spirit was untouchable,
my heart was safe

because it chose to not bow down to practically anyone.
I dare to say,

being deliberately cold and insensitive
was the happiest feeling I've ever experienced.
13.01.09

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